Rediscovery

Wow, looking through all my old posts, I have noticed about 95% of them have dealt with complaints about Jayson.

Well...... no need for that anymore, as I am now a single girl again. <---- Feels weird to say that.

Yeah, the deed has been done. I broke up with Jayson. And as heartbreaking as that is for me, I am also glad I made the decision to.

There's no need to repeat myself as to why I broke up with him..... you can read 'em all in my old posts, lol. Basically, everything I have mentioned so far in my previous posts can explain, for the most part, why I broke up with him.

But in short, I am 19. I don't believe in young people in serious relationships at such an early age. And for some reason, I can't stand the thought of a relationship lasting more than 2-3 years without marriage already  set in the picture (or a child, heh.) So, like I have said to Jayson... hopefully if we end up back together in the future, I'd be more set and ready than I am now. Jayson's well of age, but I'm not. So until I know I'm on some sort of right track to my career, and Jayson has had his foot in his set career, is making a comfortable living, AND has saved up for possibly a place of his own, then I don't think I'll be with him anytime soon. At least I know that if we got back together after he and I have accomplished things and progressed in life, we wouldn't be so held back with our life together (i.e. it wouldn't be surprising at all to announce that we would be getting married, or having a child, even.) Right now though, he should no longer have an excuse to not be able to progress with his career. I know I know, this phase may take a while... but I can only hope he really does also take the time to work on himself. I still want a future with him, and only him.

As for me? Well, it's only been 2 days since our break-up so it'll take some getting used to. I've got lots to focus on! For some reason, I'm excited to see what this little rediscovery journey of mine will bring. If fate has it and Jayson and I are back together, we'll be better and stronger than ever! Or, so I could hope hehe. I still hope he works on the things that have annoyed me in the past years, and actually TAKES the advice I have given him (i.e. healthier lifestyle, spending more time with his fam, working on his career, and everything else I have ever advised him - which is A LOT btw!) No worries, I'll work on my impatience and other negative traits about myself. *Sighhh* God please guide us. =]

Well to close this whole thing up, I wish the both of us luck in this journey apart. And for Jayson: You have been the best boyfriend and best Bestfriend to me. I seriously could not have asked for someone better! I love you soooo much, don't you forget that! - And may the odds be ever in our favor ;) XOXO